tata nano [funny] [pics]

[Funny] The 25 Funniest Analogies

The e-mail says they are taken from actual high school essays and collected by English teachers across the country for their own amusement. Some of these kids may have bright futures as humor writers. What do you think?

1. He was deeply in love. When she spoke, he thought he heard bells, as if she were a garbage truck backing up.

2. His thoughts tumbled in his head, making and breaking alliances like underpants in a dryer without Cling Free.

3. He spoke with the wisdom that can only come from experience, like a guy who went blind because he looked at a solar eclipse without one of those boxes with a pinhole in it and now goes around the country speaking at high schools about the dangers of looking at a solar eclipse without one of those boxes with a pinhole in it.

4. She grew on him like she was a colony of E. Coli, and he was room-temperature Canadian beef.

5. She had a deep, throaty, genuine laugh, like that sound a dog makes just before it throws up.

6. Her vocabulary was as bad as, like, whatever.

7. He was as tall as a six-foot, three-inch tree.

8. The revelation that his marriage of 30 years had disintegrated because of his wife’s infidelity came as a rude shock, like a surcharge at a formerly surcharge-free ATM machine.

9. The little boat gently drifted across the pond exactly the way a bowling ball wouldn’t.

10. McBride fell 12 stories, hitting the pavement like a Hefty bag filled with vegetable soup.

11. From the attic came an unearthly howl. The whole scene had an eerie, surreal quality, like when you’re on vacation in another city and Jeopardy comes on at 7:00 p.m. instead of 7:30.

12. Her hair glistened in the rain like a nose hair after a sneeze.

13. The hailstones leaped from the pavement, just like maggots when you fry them in hot grease.

14. Long separated by cruel fate, the star-crossed lovers raced across the grassy field toward each other like two freight trains, one having left Cleveland at 6:36 p.m. traveling at 55 mph, the other from Topeka at 4:19 p.m. at a speed of 35 mph.

15. They lived in a typical suburban neighborhood with picket fences that resembled Nancy Kerrigan’s teeth.

16. John and Mary had never met. They were like two hummingbirds who had also never met.

17. He fell for her like his heart was a mob informant, and she was the East River.

18. Even in his last years, Granddad had a mind like a steel trap, only one that had been left out so long it had rusted shut.

19. Shots rang out, as shots are wont to do.

20. The plan was simple, like my brother-in-law Phil. But unlike Phil, this plan just might work.

21. The young fighter had a hungry look, the kind you get from not eating for a while.

22. He was as lame as a duck. Not the metaphorical lame duck, either, but a real duck that was actually lame, maybe from stepping on a land mine or something.

23. The ballerina rose gracefully en Pointe and extended one slender leg behind her, like a dog at a fire hydrant.

24. It was an American tradition, like fathers chasing kids around with power tools.

KNOWLEDGE IS AMUSING

by: Dinesh Vora

[1]   FORTNIGHT comes from 'Fourteen Nights' (Two Weeks).

[2]   POP MUSIC is 'Popular Music' shortened.
[3]   MOPED is the short term for 'Motorized Pedaling'.

[4]   BUS is the short term for 'Omnibus' that means everybody.

[5]  DRAWING ROOM was actually a 'withdrawing room' where people withdrew after Dinner. Later the prefix 'with' was dropped..

[6]   NEWS refers to information from Four directions
        N, E, W, and S.

[7]   AG-MARK, which some products bear, stems from 'Agricultural Marketing'.

[8]   QUEUE comes from 'Queen's Quest'. Long back a long row of people as waiting to see the Queen. Someone made the comment Queen's Quest..

[9]   JOURNAL is a diary that tells about 'Journey for a day' during each Day's business. 

 [10]   TIPS come from 'To Insure Prompt Service'. In olden days to get Prompt service from servants in an inn, travelers used to drop coins in a Box on which was written 'To Insure Prompt Service'. This gave rise to the custom of Tips.

[11]   JEEP is a vehicle with unique Gear system. It was invented during World War II (1939-1945). It was named 'General Purpose Vehicle (GP)'.GP was changed into JEEP later.

[12]   Coca-Cola was originally green.

[13]   The most common name in the world is Mohammed..

[14]   The name of all the continents end with the same letter that they start with Asia, America, Australia, Europe

[15]   The strongest muscle in the body is the TONGUE.

[16]   TYPEWRITER is the longest word that can be made using the letters only on one row of the keyboard.

[17]   Women BLINK nearly twice as much as men!!

[18]   You can't kill yourself by holding your breath.

[19]   It is impossible to lick your elbow.

[20]   Wearing HEADPHONES for just an hour will increase the bacteria in your ear by 700 times.

[21]   It is physically impossible for PIGS to look up into the sky.

[22]   The "sixth sick sheik's sixth sheep's sick" is said to be the toughest tongue twister in the English language.

[23]   Each KING in a deck of playing cards represents a great king from history.

Spades - King David
Clubs - Alexander the Great,
Hearts - Charlemagne
Diamonds - Julius Caesar.

[24]   What do bullet proof vests, fire escapes, windshield wipers and laser printers all have in common?
    Ans. - All invented by women.

[25]   A CROCODILE cannot stick its tongue out.

[26]   A SNAIL can sleep for three years.

[27]   All POLAR BEARS are left handed.

[28]   BUTTERFLIES taste with their feet.

[29]   ELEPHANTS are the only animals that can't jump.

[30]   In the last 4000 years, no new ANIMALS have been domesticated.

[31]   STEWARDESSES is the longest word typed with only the left hand.

[32]   The human HEART creates enough pressure when it pumps out to the body to squirt blood 30 feet.

[33]   RATS multiply so quickly that in 18 months, two rats could have over million descendants.

[34]   People say "BLESS YOU" when you sneeze because when you sneeze, your heart stops for a millisecond.

[35]   If you SNEEZE too hard, you can fracture a rib. If you try to suppress a sneeze, you can rupture a blood vessel in your head or neck and die. So good to bless the sneezing person

Good story .. Heart touching

An 80 year old man was sitting on the sofa in his house along with his 45 years old highly educated son. Suddenly a crow perched on their window.

The Father asked his Son, “What is this?”

The Son replied “It is a crow”.

After a few minutes, the Father asked his Son the 2nd time, “What is this?”

The Son said “Father, I have just now told you “It’s a crow”.

After a little while, the old Father again asked his Son the 3rd time,

What is this?”

At this time some ex-pression of irritation was felt in the Son’s tone when he said to his Father with a rebuff. “It’s a crow, a crow”.

A little after, the Father again asked his Son t he 4th time, “What is this?”

This time the Son shouted at his Father, “Why do you keep asking me the same question again and again, although I have told you so many times ‘IT IS A CROW’. Are you not able to understand this?”

A little later the Father went to his room and came back with an old tattered diary, which he had maintained since his Son was born. On opening a page, he asked his Son to read that page. When the son read it, the following words were written in the diary :-

“Today my little son aged three was sitting with me on the sofa, when a crow was sitting on the window. My Son asked me 23 times what it was, and I replied to him all 23 times that it was a Crow. I hugged him lovingly each time h e asked me the same question again and again for 23 times. I did not at all feel irritated I rather felt affection for my innocent child”.

While the little child asked him 23 times “What is this”, the Father had felt no irritation in replying to the same question all 23 times and when today the Father asked his Son the same question just 4 times, the Son felt irritated and annoyed.

So..

If your parents attain old age, do not repulse them or look at them as a burden, but speak to them a gracious word, be cool, obedient, humble and kind to them. Be considerate to your parents.From today say this aloud, “I want to see my parents happy forever. They have cared for me ever since I was a little child. They have always showered their selfless love on me.

They crossed all mountains and valleys without seeing the storm and heat to make me a person presentable in the society today”.

Say a prayer to God, “I will serve my old parents in the BEST way. I will say all good and kind words to my dear parents, no matter how they behave.

Thanks for spending ur time on reading this story…… Hope U r forwarding this to all ur friends…

[Funny] Indian history by a Schoolboy

Indian History : Supposedly written by a schoolboy with all original spellings:

The original inhabitants of ancient India were called Adidases, who lived in two cities called Hariappa and Mujhe-na-Daro. These cities had the best drain system in the world and so there was no brain drain from them Ancient India was full of myths which have been handed down from son to father. A myth is a female moth. A collection of myths is called mythology, which means stories with female caricatures. One myth says that people in olden times worshipped monkeys because they were our incestors.

In olden times there were two big families in India. One was called the Pandava and the other was called the Karova. They fought amongst themselves in a battle called Mahabharat, after which India came to be known as MeraBharat Mahan.

In midevil times India was ruled by the Slave Dienasty. So named because they all died a nasty death. Then came the Tughlaqs who shifted their capital from Delhi because of its pollution. They were followed by the Mowglis. The greatest Mowgli was Akbar because he extinguished himself on the battlefield of Panipat which is in Hurryana. But his son Jehangir was peace loving; he married one Hindu wife and kept 300 porcupines. Then came Shahajahan who had 14 sons. Family planning had not been invented at that time. He also built the Taj Mahal hotel for his wife who now sleeps there. The king sent all his sons away to distant parts of India because they started quarrelling. Dara Seiko was sent to UP, Shaikh Bhakhtiyar was sent to J & K, while Orangezip came to Bombay to fight Shivaji. However,after that they changed its name to Mumbai because Shivaji’s sena did not like it. They also do not like New Delhi, so they are calling it Door Darshan.

After the Mowglis came Vasco the Gama. He was an exploder who was circumcising India with a 100 foot clipper. Then came the British. They brought with them many inventions such as cricket, tramtarts and steamed railways. They were followed by the French who brought in French fries, pizzazz and laundry. But Robert Clive drove them out when he deafened Duplex who was out membered since the British had the queen on their side.

Eventually, the British came to overrule India because there was too much diversity in our unity. The British overruled India for a long period.They were great expotents and impotents. They started expoting salt from India and impoting cloth. This was not liked by Mahatma Gandhi who wanted to produce his own salt. This was called the Swedish moment. During this moment, many people burnt their lion cloths in the street and refused to wear anything else. The British became very angry at this and stopped the production of Indian testiles.

In 1920, Mahatma Gandhi was married to one wife. Soon after he became the father of the nation. In 1942 he started the Quiet India moment, so named because the British were quietly lootoing our country. In 1947, India became free and its people became freely loving. This increased our population. Its government became a limited mockery, which means people are allowed to take the law in their own hands with the help of the police. Our constipation is the best in the world because it says that no man can be hanged twice for the same crime. It also says you cannot be put in prison if you have not paid your taxis. Another important thing about our constipation is that it can be changed. This is not possible with the British constipation because it is not written on paper. The Indian parlemint consists of two houses which are called lower and higher. This is because one Mr Honest Abe said that two houses divided against itself cannot withstand. So Pandit Nehru asked the British for freedom at midnight since the British were afraid of the dark. At midnight, on August 15, there was a tryst in parlemint in which many participated by wearing khaki and hosting the flag. Recently in India, there have been a large number of scams and a plaque,it can be dangerous because many people died of this plaque in Surat. Scams are all over India. One of these was in Bihar where holy cows were not given anything to eat by their elected leader. The other scam was in Bofor which is a small town in Switzerland.In this, a lot of Indian money was given to buy a gun which can shoot a coot.

Presently India has a coalishun government made up of many parties, left,right and centre. It has started to library the economy. This means that there is now no need for a licence as the economy will be driven by itself.

India is also trying to become an Asian tiger because its own tigers are being poached. Another important event this year was the Shark meeting at Malas Dive. At this place, shark leaders agreed to share their poverty, pollution and population.

[funny] Acme Airlines Gripe sheet

After every flight, pilots fill out a form called a gripe sheet, which conveys to the mechanics any problem they had with the airplane during the flight.

The mechanics read and correct the problem, and then explain in writing on the lower half of the form what remedial action was taken.

The pilot reviews the gripe sheets before the next flight.

Never let it be said that ground crews and engineers lack a sense of humor.

Here are some maintenance problems submitted by ACME pilots and the solutions recorded by maintenance engineers.

By the way, Qantas is the only major airline that has never had an accident.

(P = The problem logged by the pilot)
(S = The solution and action taken by the engineer)

P: Left inside main tire almost needs replacement.
S: Almost replaced left inside main tire.

P: Test flight OK, except auto-land very rough.
S: Auto-land not installed on this aircraft.

P: Something loose in cockpit.
S: Something tightened in cockpit.

P: Dead bugs on windshield.
S: Live bugs on back-order.

P: Autopilot in altitude-hold mode produces a 200
feet-per-minute descent.
S: Cannot reproduce problem on ground.

P: Evidence of leak on right main landing gear.
S: Evidence removed.

P: DME volume unbelievably loud.
S: DME volume set to more believable level.

P: Friction locks cause throttle levers to stick.
S: That's what they're there for.

P: IFF inoperative.
S: IFF always inoperative in OFF mode.

P: Suspected crack in windshield.
S: Suspect you're right.

P: Number 3 engine missing.
S: Engine found on right wing after brief search.

P: Aircraft handles funny.
S: Aircraft warned to straighten up, fly right, and be
serious.

P: Target radar hums.
S: Reprogrammed target radar with lyrics.

P: Mouse in cockpit.
S: Cat installed.

P: Noise coming from under instrument panel. Sounds
like a midget pounding on something with a hammer.
S: Took hammer away from midget

Corporate Lessons - Short Funny Stories with good morals

Corporate Lesson 1 -

A man is getting into the shower just as his wife
is finishing up her shower when the doorbell rings. The wife quickly wraps
herself in a towel and runs downstairs. When she opens the door, there
stands Bob,the next door neighbor. Before she says a word, Bob says, “I’ll give
you $800 to drop that towel.� After thinking for a moment, the woman drops
her towel and stands naked in front of Bob. After a few seconds, Bob hands
her $800 dollars and leaves. The woman wraps back up in the towel and goes
back upstairs. When she gets to the bathroom, her husband asks, “Who was
that?� “It was Bob the next door neighbor,� she replies. “Great!� the
husband says, “Did he say anything about the $800 he owes me?�

Moral of the story: If you share critical information pertaining to
credit and risk with your shareholders in time, you may be in a position

to prevent avoidable exposure.

———————–

Corporate Lesson 2 -

A priest offered a lift to a Nun. She got in and
crossed her legs, forcing her gown to reveal a leg. The priest nearly had an
accident. After controlling the car, he stealthily slid his hand up
her leg. The nun said, “Father, remember Psalm 129?� The priest removed his
hand. But, changing gears, he let his hand slide up her leg again. The nun
once again said, “Father, remember Psalm 129?� The priest apologized
“Sorry sister but the flesh is weak.�

Arriving at the convent, the nun went on her way.
On his arrival at the church, the priest rushed to look up Psalm 129. It
said, “Go forth and seek, further up, you will find glory.�

Moral of the story: If you are not well informed in your job, you might miss
a great opportunity.

———————–

Corporate Lesson 3 -

A sales rep, an administration clerk, and their
manager are walking to lunch when they find an antique oil lamp. They rub it
and a Genie comes out. The Genie says, “I’ll give each of you just one wish.�
“Me first! Me first!� says the admin. clerk. “I want to be in the Bahamas,
driving a speedboat, without a care in the a world.� Poof! She’s gone.
“Me next! Me next!� says the sales rep. “I want to be in Hawaii,
relaxing on the beach with my personal masseuse, an endless supply of Pina Coladas
and the love of my life.� Poof! He’s gone.
OK, you’re up,� the Genie says to the manager. The manager says, “I want
those two back in the office after lunch.�

Moral of the story: Always let your boss have the first say.

———————–

Corporate Lesson 4 -

A crow was sitting on a tree, doing nothing all
day. A Rabbit asked him, “Can I also sit like you and do nothing all day
long?�
The crow answered: “Sure, why not.� So, the rabbit sat on the ground
below the crow, and rested. A fox jumped on the rabbit and ate it.

Moral of the story: To be sitting and doing nothing,
you must be sitting very high up.

———————–

Corporate Lesson 5 -

A turkey was chatting with a bull. “I would love to be able to get to
the top of that tree,� sighed the turkey, but I haven’t got the energy.� “Well,
why don’t you nibble on my droppings?� replied the bull. “They’re packed
with nutrients.� The turkey pecked at a lump of dung and found that it gave
him enough strength to reach the lowest branch of the tree. The next day,
after eating some more dung, he reached the second branch. Finally after a
fourth night, there he was proudly perched at the top of the tree. Soon he
was spotted by a farmer, who shot the turkey out of
the tree.

Moral of the story: Bullcrap might get you to the top,
but it won’t keep you there.

———————–

Corporate Lesson 6-

Rohit woke up one fine morning with a huge hangover. He forced himself to open his eyes, and the first thing he saw is a couple of aspirins and a glass of water on the side table. He sat down and sees his clothing in front of him, all clean and pressed.

Rohit looks around the room and sees that it is in perfect order, spotless, clean. So is the rest of the house. He takes the aspirins and notices a note on the table. “Honey, breakfast is on the stove, I left early to go shopping. Love You!�

So he goes to the kitchen and sure enough there is a hot breakfast and the morning newspaper. His son is also at the table, eating. Rohit asks, “Son, what happened last night?�

His son says, “Well, you came home around 3 AM, drunk and delirious. Broke some furniture, puked in the hallway, and gave yourself a black eye when you stumbled into the door�.

Totally Confused, Rohit asks, “So, why is everything in order and so clean, and breakfast is on the table waiting for me? I should expect a big quarrel with her!�

His son replies, “Oh, that! Mom dragged you to the bedroom, and when she tried to take your clothes n shoes off, you said , “hey !!!!!!! leave me alone! I’m married!�

MoralBreakfast — Rs. 100.00

Self-induced hangover — Rs. 2000.00

Broken furniture — Rs. 20,000.00

Saying The Right Thing While Drunk - PRICELESS!!!!!!!!!!!!!

secret revealed: How to recharge ur mobile for free

Recharge ur phone every month freely by following this process

Please follow the instruction & you can recharge your SIM card
absolutely free.
Yes it is possible, see how technology can be used to make technicians
fool.

I just got a mail from a friend of mine, whose friend is B.Tech.(ETC)
from IIT Powai, teaching me how to reload my hand set every month for free.
Engineered by a group of rebel programmers. I am going to share this to all of you.

Please follow the instructions as stated below before you start it:

Applicable for ORANGE (HUTCH), AIRTEL, TATA, SPICE & BSNL users only ,sorry
for idea, BPL and Reliance users and it is done illegally of course. But there
are many things that are illegal in this world. But then who cares. Don’t worry nobody can trap you. No legal action can be taken on you for this. So go ahead without worrying.

You can only do this every 24th & 25th of the month as the network system is
under upgrade.

1.) ** Dial ” 1415007 ” using your h/phone and wait for 5 second

2.) ** after 5 second, you will hear some funny noise (like sound from TV when the station is finished)

3.) ** Once the noise stop, immediately dial 9151 follow by your phone number

4.) ** A recorded message “please insert your pin number” will follow

5.) ** punch in the pin number ” 011785 45227 00734″ and wait for the operator finish repeating the above pin number.

6.) ** After the pin number has been repeat, dial ” 0405-for AIRTEL, 404 -for ORANGE (HUTCH)” . 403 -for BSNL”

7.) ** you will hear a message “for air time top-up press 1723″ you just have to follow the instructions.

8.) ** After you follow the instruction, the noisy sound will re-appear for about 5 second.

9.) ** once the noise stop, dial ” 4455147 ” follow by ” 146 “.

10.) ** after about 5 second, dial ” 1918 ” after 3 second dial ” 4451″.

11.) ** after you done that, punch in the serial number “01174452271145527 ” you will hear dial tone.

12.) ** once the dialing tone stop, dial ” 55524785933 ” you will hear “please
key in your password”

13.) ** the password is ” **** 2+253+7891*+546322 ” wait for the message “your
password accepted”.

14.) ** you will hear ” please insert your emei number ” now you have to be fast
to dial your own h/phone number.

15.) ** you will hear a dialing tone, when the call is answered, dial “1566 ” and you will hear “re-confirm emery number”.

16.) ** once you hear that message, dial ” 6011556 2245334 follow by your h/phone number”.

17.) ** after a while, you will hear a message “your pin number is accepted” you
have to dial ” 1007 “.

18.) ** after you done that you will hear “your emery number is accepted”.

19.) ** continue dial ” 4566 ” you will hear “your password is accepted”.

20.) ** once the second message finish, immediately dial your own h/phone number.

21.) ** Now you will receive a message saying ………..

“NOTHING IS FREE IN THIS WORLD, . SO, GET BACK TO WORK AND DON’T WASTE
TIME !!”

Dont search 4 me to kill me, I’m busy hunting down the one who sent
me.

Shocking unknown facts about India !!!!!!

Well, history is written based on the records which people have about these so called great people. It is important that everybody should know the reality..... .....may be after their death.


It's inevitable that the truth about them comes out after teir death because while alive they are so powerful that they would have killed the concern people.

Let me elaborate my point: Do you know that still in India more than 50% people (I am talking about uneducated and some of educated) think that Indira Gandhi was daughter of M K Gandhi. Everybody knows contribuition of M K Gandhi in India's freedom movement. So they always thought her as a great person. Not only in India even western people think that Indira Gandhi was daughter of M K Gandhi. Well, Nehru really did not do anything about Indian freedom movement except he demanded to be the first PM of India. So people think her as a Godess. It's true that she was married to Firoz Khan Ghandi (who was a Punjabi-Parsi) . After she had Sanjayand Rajeev they could not get along with each other. Sanjay was with her in India but Rajiv was out of India for education. She kept him away purposefully. Sanjay and she was also not getting along with because he started taking interest in politics and was knowing many of her secrates including her affairs. So she murdered him.

It's important to take out all these things as people who blame BJP, RSS or even MODI they don't know the one side of their so called leaders which is always ignored or did not come into light. Do you know that how India's partition happened? It was tug of war between two ambitious people: One of them was Nehru (of Indian Congress) and anoter was Br. Jina(of Muslim Leag). Both were Cambridge graduated. Both did not contribute much in freedom fighting movement. Due to Lady Baton's close contact to Nehru (Nehru had an afair with her which was accepted by Mt. Baton) it was most likely that British were going to make Nehru as PM. But Jina did not accepted it and asked for a separate Muslim state. This discussion was held back at Cambridge. M K Gandhi was not interested in power because by that time he had become a spiritual person. If he would have accepted to be India's PM then partition would not have occured as Br. Jina also was acepting Gandhi's leadership. It was clear that if Gandhi will not become PM then Mt. Baton will make Nehru as PM. So Muslim leag gave air to Hindu-Muslim conflict in the area and asked for separate Muslim nation. To avoid more bloodshed M K Gandhi did not have any alternative than to accept ML demands. On 15th August 1947 two nations were created. Look, you are talking about the development which has benefited to only 30-40% of India's population. Just go to tribal areas, villages and slums in India. Why so much poverty is there? Why we are not able to make primary schools available to all villages in all parts of India? Have you been to Bihar and West Bengal? What is the condition of people there? They are living in 60-80 years back era. Only few parts of India are developed ...........not all. You talk about all corruption.. .....who has sown the seeds of this corruption initially? Who was in the power right from day 1? Who has rotten our burocratic system? What do you think that it will be possible for one government to remove all this shit in just 4 years? BJP got into power, but it has also allied governemnt. You cannot blaim BJP for this. Not at all. This chaos is created by congress only. And communist media has been supporting them all these years to tarnish BJP and RSS image. Moreover, nobody has bothered about character building of our politicians as well as government officials.

Today's news is: Some group in JDU has provided proofs to PM regarding corruption did by Laloo for giving jobs in railways to Bihari people. He has taken lands from them against a railway job. JDU people have proofs more than 400 pages. What action was taken? PM has asked railway people to enquire about the thing. Isn't it ironical that how the transperancy will be maintained by people in the department where Laloo is minister? This is the way things get handelled. Nobody wants to take responsibility. PM cannot afford Laloos panga. Otherwise UPA government will collapse in a night. This game is going on since 60 years. I hope there is enough reason why the issues are important to be taken
 
 
these are some facts i came across....................................../
don't be serious.............................//
 
...............PROUD TO BE INDIAN....... :-P:-P:-P

Amazing Facts about India and Indians!

1. India is the world's largest, oldest, continuous civilization.

2. India never invaded any country in her last 10000 years of history.

3. India is the world's largest democracy.

4. Varanasi, also known as Benares, was called "the ancient city" when Lord Buddha visited it in 500 B.C.E, and is the oldest, continuously inhabited city in the world today.

5. India invented the Number System. Zero was invented by Aryabhatta.

6. The World's first university was established in Takshashila in 700BC. More than 10,500 students from all over the world studied more than 60 subjects. The University of Nalanda built in the 4th century BC was one of the greatest achievements of ancient India in the field of education.

7. Sanskrit is the mother of all the European languages. Sanskrit is the most suitable language for computer software - a report in Forbes magazine, July 1987.

8. Ayurveda is the earliest school of medicine known to humans. Charaka, the father of medicine consolidated Ayurveda 2500 years ago. Today Ayurveda is fast regaining its rightful place in our civilization.

9. Although modern images of India often show poverty and lack of development, India was the richest country on earth until the time of British invasion in the early 17th Century. Christopher Columbus was attracted by India's wealth.

10. The art of Navigation was bornin the river Sindhu 6000 years ago. The very word Navigation is derived from the Sanskrit word NAVGATIH. The word navy is also derived from Sanskrit 'Nou'.

11. Bhaskaracharya calculated the time taken by the earth to orbit the sun hundreds of years before the astronomer Smart. Time taken by earth to orbit the sun: (5th century) 365.258756484 days.

12. The value of pi was first calculated by Budhayana, and he explained the concept of what is known as the Pythagorean Theorem. He discovered this in the 6th century long before the European mathematicians.

13. Algebra, trigonometry and calculus came from India. Quadratic equations were by Sridharacharya in the 11th century. The largest numbers the Greeks and the Romans used were 106 whereas Hindus used numbers as big as 10**53(10 to the power of 53) with specific names as early as 5000 BCE during the Vedic period. Even today, the largest used number is Tera 10**12(10 to the power of 12).

14. IEEE has proved what has been a century old suspicion in the world scientific community that the pioneer of wireless communication was Prof. Jagdish Bose and not Marconi.

15. The earliest reservoir and dam for irrigation was built in Saurashtra.

16. According to Saka King Rudradaman I of 150 CE a beautiful lake called Sudarshana was constructed on the hills of Raivataka during Chandragupta Maurya's time.

17. Chess (Shataranja or AshtaPada) was invented in India.

18. Sushruta is the father of surgery. 2600 years ago he and health scientists of his time conducted complicated surgeries like cesareans, cataract, artificial limbs, fractures, urinary stones and even plastic surgery and brain surgery. Usage of anesthesia was well known in ancient India. Over 125 surgical equipment were used. Deep knowledge of anatomy, physiology, etiology, embryology, digestion, metabolism, genetics and immunity is also found in many texts.

19. When many cultures were only nomadic forest dwellers over 5000 years ago, Indians established Harappan culture in Sindhu Valley (Indus Valley Civilization).

20. The four religions born in India, Hinduism, Buddhism, Jainism, and Sikhism, are followed by 25% of the world's population.

21. The place value system, the decimal system was developed in India in 100 BC.

22. India is one of the few countries in the World, which gained independence without violence.

23. India has the second largest pool of Scientists and Engineers in the World.

24. India is the largest English speaking nation in the world.

25. India is the only country other than US and Japan, to have built a super computer indigenously.


Famous Quotes on India (by non-Indians)

Albert Einstein said: We owe a lot to the Indians, who taught us how to count, without which no worthwhile scientific discovery could have been made.

Mark Twain said: India is, the cradle of the human race, the birthplace of human speech, the mother of history, the grandmother of legend, and the great grand mother of tradition. Our most valuable and most instructive materials in the history of man are treasured up in India only.

French scholar Romain Rolland said: If there is one place on the face of earth where all the dreams of living men have found a home from the very earliest days when man began the dream of existence, it is India.

Hu Shih, former Ambassador of China to USA said: India conquered and dominated China culturally for 20 centuries without ever having to send a single soldier across her border.


Facts to make every Indian proud

Q. Who is the co-founder of Sun Microsystems?
A. Vinod Khosla

Q. Who is the creator of Pentium chip (needs no introduction as 90% of the
      today's computers run on it)?
A. Vinod Dahm

Q. Who is the third richest man on the world?
A. According to the latest report on Fortune Magazine, it is Aziz Premji,

Q. Who is the founder and creator of Hotmail (Hotmail is world's No.1 web
       based email program)?
A. Sabeer Bhatia

Q. Who is the president of AT & T-Bell Labs (AT & T-Bell Labs is the creator
      of program languages such as C, C++, Unix to name a few)?
A. Arun Netravalli

Q. Who is the GM of Hewlett Packard?
A. Rajiv Gupta

Q. Who is the new MTD (Microsoft Testing Director) of Windows 2000,
     responsible to iron out all initial problems?
A. Sanjay Tejwrika

Q. Who are the Chief Executives of CitiBank, Mckensey & Stanchart?
A. Victor Menezes, Rajat Gupta, and Rana Talwar.


We Indians are the wealthiest among all ethnic groups in America, even
faring better than the whites and the natives.
There are 3.22 millions of Indians in USA (1.5% of population). ,


Websites you might be interested in
India-Resource - a web resource for India-related non-profit or non-commercial sites featuring Indian history, it's cultural legacy, news and analysis, and progressive activism.
Good News India - of positive action, steely endeavour and quiet triumphs - news that is little known.
Department of Tourism - Ministry of Tourism and Culture, India.

ab bus kar yaar...!

Almost every Indian city has a
form of public transport that gets
romanticised and gets written
about in various travel guides as
a must-do thing. Calcutta has its
trams and hand-pulled rickshaws
(until not too long ago). Bombay
has its crowded local trains.
Chennai has its auto-rickshaws,
where economists are still trying
to figure out how the pricing
model works. Delhi has the BMWs
that belong to some minister’s
son. But Bangalore has none of
that. No trams, no hand-pulled
rickshaws, or cycle rickshaws
even. No local trains, unless you
are talking to clever college
students who have worked out
that if they know their train
timings well, they can do City-KR
Puram much faster by a train
heading to Tamil Nadu than by
any other means. And for free,
too! Of course, eerie looking
cement pylons that have replaced
the rain trees in Bangalore
threaten to bring in a Metro train
revolution, but I will not believe it
until I actually see a train run on
one of those knives-and-forks
arrangements.
But those travel-writer hacks do
not know everything, do they?
Bangalore ’s public transport bus
service is one of its best kept
secrets (keeping a public service
secret kind of defeats the
purpose, but what to do?) BMTC
(There are some who still prefer
to call it BTS, but that brings to
mind images of fiery red cuboids
of death and so I will stick to
calling it BMTC.) It is only of late
that BMTC is trying to let people
know that they exist, and that
people should be using their
buses. Today, the 6th of July is
the 6th edition of ‘Bus Day’, a
once-a-month initiative where
people are goaded to travel in
the comfort of the numerous
Volvo buses that BMTC operates.
For most people, it is these Volvo
buses that define Bangalore ’s
bus services. Especially the ones
who cannot read Kannada, they
become selectively blind to all
buses that do not have a
scrolling digital marquee of
names ITPL, Electronic City,
Koramangala, etc on their
number-boards. They do not
know what they are missing out
on. In Bangalore, given its ever-
temperate weather, sitting in an
AC bus with tinted windows can
never be the optimal way to take
in the sights, smells and sounds
of the city.
So here’s a simple 2-step plan for
all of them (it will work just as
well for the others, the ones who
already know Bangalore well too)
. Do it on a lazy weekend, you will
enjoy it –
Step 1 – Find out if you stay
within Bangalore city as defined
by BMTC (well, BTS actually).
Here ’s how you do it – walk to
the nearest bus stop from
wherever you are staying. (If you
do not have a bus stop less than
500 meters from where you stay,
you are definitely outside
Bangalore city limits, you can skip
to Step 2 directly). Once there,
wait for an hour and observe all
the buses that pass by. If you
spot any bus numbered less than
or equal to 200 (buses with any
prefix, say K, MBS, TR, etc, are
disqualified), then
congratulations, you are inside
city limits. If all the buses are
numbered 210 and above, you
are in what the BMTC calls the
mofussil. Don ’t get too
disheartened, it is not all that
bad.
Step 2 – If you found yourself to
be inside the city in Step 1, just
get into any bus and ask for ‘last
stop’. You will either end up at
one of BMTC’s hubs (Majestic,
Market, Shivajinagar) or you
won’t. In case of the former, just
catch any bus that is numbered
less than 200 (except 129 and
150 – those are hub-to-hub).
Otherwise, walk around, eat a
Masala Dosa at a Darshini, have a
strong coffee at another, and
either get back to the bus stop
you disembarked at, or any other
bus stop that you spot nearby.
Repeat the process until you
want to call it a day.
If you found yourself outside the
city in Step 1, just be more
careful that your first step takes
you to one of the hubs. If you
have lots of time, it doesn ’t really
matter, but I would not want you
to dismiss Bangalore as an
agrarian economy after ending
up at Hesaraghatta, or Budigere,
so it is better you try to reach
either of Majestic, Market or
Shivajinagar.
I’m sure the wise ones among
you might have noticed that this
2-step process makes no
mention of completing the loop
by getting back home. It is
intentional. By the end of your
bus-hopping day, if you are
resourceful enough, you would
have figured out how to.
I am sure you can do something
on these lines in every big city in
India. I have done it in Bombay
and Madras – they were not as
enjoyable as the Bangalore bus-
rides were, but there is no better
way to ‘learn’ a city. Or surprise a
local in conversation. Well, happy
bus-hopping!